Dance in the moment

I have posted some posts now about powerful questions, but it is also important to that good questions are one thing. But what if you use your time with the mentee to prepare the next questions and not listen properly to what your mentee is saying?

A great coach taught at a University and their Coaching Certificate for many years and he found that students were ever eager for the right «powerful question.» It became a mild obsession among some of them to have just the right, the perfect, the well phrased question that would tip a coaching conversation to depth and value. And he too had long sought those powerful questions – and still do.

Over time he began to notice that some of these emerging coaches were missing whole chunks of critical dialogue – they were talking past treasured clues that the clients were freely giving up. But they had great questions!

He began challenging the coaches to forget their «powerful questions,» to risk asking stupid questions or, when right, to ask nothing at all and remain still in silent expectation.

There are times when focusing on the best question distracts us from attending to the wealth of data being provided in the coaching interaction. Of course there are terrific questions to prompt the coaching dialogue – dozens have been listed. His greatest task is to be curious – to make efforts to be present to the exchange. When he pull that off he find that the questions he was seeking are inherent in the conversation, He do not require to remember or think of a question.

I was also like the students who wanted to have all the powerful questions ready for every mentee/mentor session. But what happened, well I could´t use them because the mentee respond differently than I had thought of. But after more experience I find myself starting to go with the flow, or dancing in the moment…

Powerful mentoring/coaching sessions

Some coaches also are posting a series of questions and enough questions for a whole year or so, and here we are talking about different situations.


* Establishing Trust-

A. What expectations do you have as a result of our coaching session?
B. What are your short and long term goals?
C. Have you ever been coached before? (have them describe their experience)

* Focus-

A. What do you want to accomplish today?
B. What’s the priority?
C. Where do you want to start?

* Possibilities and Options-

A. Do you have ideas for a solution to the problem?
B. What ideas do you have to help meet your goals?
C. What do think would happen if… (I left the total solution up to you)
D. What other ideas could help you meet your goals?
E. What do you prefer to try and why?
F. If you were sitting in my chair how would you handle this?

* an Action Plan- (setting SMART goals)

A. What is it that you will accomplish? I will (they need to be specific, also
realistic, too many goals are not realistic)
B. What will success look like? Needs to be measurable (quantitative)
C. Tell me one step can you take now? Needs to be action oriented
D. Of all the options we discussed, which is the best? Needs to be realistic
E. When will you accomplish this goal? Need a definite time frame
F. What support or resources do you need to achieve your desired results? List
and reaffirm your support (be specific about what you are willing to offer)

* Barriers-

A. What roadblocks do you expect?
B. How will you overcome?
C. Is there anything in your way now? If so, what?
D. If all roadblocks are removed, is there anything else that would prevent you
from succeeding?
E. What concerns do you have?

* Commitments and Goals-

A. What will you do and by when?
B. What resources will you use to complete your next steps?
C. What are your next steps?
D. What do you commit to completing by next meeting?
E. How do you want me to hold you accountable?

* and Measure Results-

A. How do you feel about your actual results compared to your goal?
B. What’s working? What’s not working and what will you change going
C. What measures did you put in place to help ensure your success?
D. What roadblocks did you face and how did you deal with them?
E. Since our last meeting what have you learned about yourself as it pertains to
goal setting?

Celebrate your achievements

I have also contributed to «Favorite coaching questions», with a question I find important. When you are working to reach your goal I think it is important to celebrate when you reach it, therefore:

How would you like to celebrate when reaching your goal? 

And I think that is a important question because we can´t just thick it out of the to-do list and then go for the next goal. We have to celebrate to tell yourself that you have reach a goal, stop and lean back for a moment…


This is posted on my birthday 1st of october, and I am going out to celebrate with good friends and family.

More powerful questions

A coach  was taught by her boss 3 powerful questions which she use to guide herself and coach her staff, after certain event or project or even appraisal

1) what have you done well
2) what can you improve
3) what have you learn


Another coach shared a simple but yet big questions:

«Only you know what you want and what is stopping you, are you prepared to share that with me?