So happy to be part of the exciting development in the coaching industry, the leading organizations in the industry are collaborating to make the industry even better. And we will start with a real bang, a joint day conference on May 8th in Oslo at the Research Park.
The theme of the conference is: "Bridging the Gap: Preserving Humanity in a Chaotic World"
We have collaborated on a coaching standard in Norway and from there we have experienced how much we can learn from each other - and how much stronger we become when we share knowledge, inspiration and insight across the diversity of the different coaching directions.
#thetalkbymentorguru #Mentorguru #emccnorge #icfnorge #gestaltcoaching #learncoaching #dncf #coaching #mentoring #norge
Personal vs. Professional Growth: Do You Have to Choose?
Finding the perfect balance between personal and professional growth is a topic that everyone seems to be obsessed with. The internet is full of advice on how to achieve «work-life balance» like it’s some magical formula that, once discovered, will solve all your problems.
But here’s the real question: Is balance really the goal? Or is it just an illusion that’s holding you back?
In this blog post, we’re going to break down:
- Why chasing balance can be a trap
- How to combine personal and professional growth without burning out
- The role of holistic health in building a sustainable lifestyle
- Practical tips for managing your time to create a more fulfilling life
The Myth of Balance – Why It Can Hold You Back
Let’s be honest: Life is not about achieving perfect balance. It’s about making constant adjustments to stay on course. Think of a tightrope walker – they’re never in perfect balance, but they keep moving forward by continuously readjusting.
🔹 According to Cal Newport, author of Deep Work, people who dive deep into focused work are far more productive and satisfied than those who try to balance everything evenly.
🔹 Research from Harvard Business Review reveals that the most satisfied individuals are not the ones with perfect balance, but those who have clear priorities and live in alignment with them.
🔹 The Flow Theory by Mihály Csíkszentmihályi shows that we’re happiest when we’re fully engaged in a meaningful task – not when we’re trying to do everything at once.
So, what’s the takeaway?
Balance might actually be stopping you from achieving real growth. Instead of constantly chasing an elusive equilibrium, it’s more productive to focus on intensity and prioritization.
How to Combine Personal and Professional Growth Without Burning Out
If balance is a myth, then what’s the alternative? The answer is strategic growth. Here are some proven strategies:
1️⃣ Growth Stacking – Maximizing Your Time
Growth Stacking is about combining different growth activities simultaneously. It’s not about doing more; it’s about doing things smarter.
Examples:
- Listening to podcasts while working out.
- Reflecting on your goals while drinking your morning coffee.
- Turning casual conversations into learning opportunities.
Why it works: It saves time, increases efficiency, and accelerates progress by stacking multiple areas of growth together.
2️⃣ Non-Negotiables – Set Your Boundaries
If you don’t set boundaries, you’ll end up trying to be everything to everyone. Create clear rules for when you’re “on” and when you’re “off.”
Examples:
- No work emails after 6 PM.
- Keeping your mornings free from social media.
- Setting non-negotiable blocks of time for personal projects or family.
3️⃣ The Sprint Model – Intensity Over Balance
Forget about balancing everything perfectly. Instead, focus intensely for short bursts. The Sprint Model encourages you to work in 12-week cycles with clearly defined goals.
Why it works: It creates urgency, boosts productivity, and helps you avoid burnout by alternating periods of hard work with intentional rest.
Holistic Health – Building a Foundation for Growth
You can’t build a skyscraper on a shaky foundation. Holistic health isn’t about perfection; it’s about creating a solid base for sustainable growth.
Key Areas to Focus On:
- Physical Health: Exercise, sleep, nutrition. It’s non-negotiable.
- Mental Health: Mindfulness, reflection, and digital detox.
- Social Health: Quality relationships over quantity.
- Emotional Health: Finding purpose and meaning in what you do.
Time Management Tips for a More Fulfilling Life
If you want to grow in multiple areas, you need to own your time. Here’s how:
- Conscious Time Management: Create weekly schedules that include blocks for work, rest, learning, and social activities.
- Invest in Yourself: Never stop learning. Personal growth fuels professional growth and vice versa.
- Set Clear Goals: What do you want to achieve over the next 12 weeks? Break it down and tackle it with laser focus.
Conclusion: Prioritization Over Balance
Balance is a nice idea, but it’s not what drives growth. Instead of striving for an unrealistic ideal, focus on intensity, priority, and strategic growth. When you stop trying to make everything even, you start making real progress.
So, here’s my challenge for you: What will you prioritize today? And how will you combine your personal and professional growth to get there?
Leave a comment below or share your thoughts on social media. I’d love to hear how you’re tackling this challenge!
How to Take Control of Your Inner Voice – And Stop Sabotaging Yourself
We all have that voice in our head. You know the one. The voice that whispers:
- «You’re not good enough.»
- «You’ll never succeed.»
- «Why even bother trying?»
But here’s the thing: That voice is lying. And the worst part? We believe it. We allow it to dictate our actions, our decisions, and ultimately, our potential.
What Is Negative Self-Talk and Limiting Beliefs?
Negative self-talk is the constant, often subconscious, stream of thoughts that undermines your confidence and abilities. It’s that automatic reaction that tells you «you can’t» before you’ve even tried.
Limiting beliefs, on the other hand, are the mental barriers we create based on fear, doubt, or past experiences. Statements like:
- «I’m not smart enough.»
- «I don’t have the resources to succeed.»
- «It’s too late for me to make a change.»
These thoughts are not based on facts. They are assumptions built on fear and insecurity.
The Science Behind Negative Self-Talk
Research from the National Science Foundation reveals that 80% of our daily thoughts are negative, and 95% are repetitive. This means that if you were tearing yourself down yesterday, chances are you’re doing the exact same thing today.
Our brains are wired for negativity as a survival mechanism. Negative thoughts stick to us like Velcro, while positive ones slide off like Teflon. It’s called Negativity Bias. But survival mode is not where growth happens.
Why This Matters
Your inner dialogue shapes your reality. If you constantly tell yourself that you can’t do something, your brain will find ways to prove you right. It influences how you approach challenges, how you react to setbacks, and how much effort you put into achieving your goals.
The worst part? We often don’t even realize we’re doing it.
How to Take Control of Your Inner Voice
It’s time to change the conversation happening inside your head. Here are three powerful steps you can take:
- Challenge Your Thoughts:
- When a negative thought arises, question it. Ask yourself: «Is this really true?» «Where is the evidence?»
- More often than not, you’ll find that your thoughts are assumptions, not facts.
- Reframe Your Mindset:
- Replace «I can’t» with «I’m learning.» Instead of «I’m terrible at this,» try «I’m getting better every day.»
- Language matters. Change how you speak to yourself, and you’ll change how you feel about yourself.
- Take Action Despite Fear:
- Fear is inevitable. But action breaks the cycle.
- Break tasks into smaller steps and celebrate small wins. Progress builds confidence.
For Mentors and Coaches
If you’re mentoring or coaching others, understanding their negative self-talk is crucial. Listen carefully to the language your mentee uses. Ask powerful questions like:
- «What story are you telling yourself that’s holding you back?»
- «If you weren’t afraid, what would you do differently?»
You are not there to provide answers but to help them uncover their own truth and power.
Final Thoughts
The voice in your head doesn’t have to be your enemy. It can be your greatest ally if you take control of the narrative.
Listen to my latest podcast episode: «The Inner Voice Is Lying – Here’s How to Take Control» where I break down this topic and give you practical tools to shift your mindset for good.
What’s one negative thought you’ve been holding on to? How will you challenge it today?
Pathways to Peace: The Impact of EFT on Mental Health

In a world where stress and anxiety are on the rise, many are seeking effective methods to manage psychological challenges. One such method that is gaining ground for its remarkable results is Emotional Freedom Techniques (EFT). This blog post will explore how EFT, often referred to as «tapping» or mental acupuncture, works and its impact on mental health.
What is EFT?
EFT is a psychological acupressure technique, often referred to as tapping. It combines elements from acupuncture, neurolinguistic programming, energy medicine, and thought field therapy. The method involves tapping lightly on specific meridian points on the body while focusing on a particular emotional stressor or psychological issue.
Fundamental Principles of EFT
The core principle behind EFT is that all negative emotions are due to disturbances in the body’s energy system. By tapping on selected points while thinking about and verbalizing the specific issue, it is claimed that one can restore balance in the energy system, thereby reducing or eliminating the negative symptom.
EFT and Psychological Issues
EFT has proven particularly effective in addressing a range of psychological disorders, including anxiety, depression, post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD), and phobias. What makes EFT appealing is its ability to quickly reduce the emotional impact of memories and incidents that trigger psychological discomfort. This can often be achieved in just a few minutes, and the results are sometimes permanent.
Research Support for EFT
Several studies have supported the effectiveness of EFT. Research indicates that tapping can reduce the production of cortisol, a stress hormone, and increase the production of serotonin, a well-being hormone, contributing to a sense of calm. Furthermore, clinical trials have shown that EFT can be as effective as traditional therapy, including cognitive behavioral therapy, in treating certain psychological conditions.
Personal Stories and Testimonials
The most powerful affirmations of EFT’s effectiveness often come from personal stories and testimonials. Many people from around the world have shared their experiences on how EFT has helped them overcome serious psychological issues and led to significant life improvements. These stories not only underline the method’s potential but also provide hope to those who are still struggling.
Concluding Thoughts
In the quest for better mental health, it is important to keep an open mind about alternative treatments like EFT. While it is not a «one-size-fits-all» solution, EFT has proven to be a valuable method for many seeking peace and emotional freedom. By integrating traditional and modern therapeutic techniques, we can open the doors to new, effective ways to heal. As we continue to explore and understand the influence of energy-based therapies, we can potentially revolutionize the way we treat psychological disorders, offering pathways to peace for those in need.
In this blog post, we have looked at how EFT works, its scientific basis, and personal success stories. It becomes clear that while more research is needed to fully understand and verify EFT’s effectiveness, it offers a promising alternative for those seeking relief and healing in their mental health struggles.
If you talk or understand Norwegian, you can listen to my podcast about the topic.
Competition, Charisma and Master Waiter: Mathis`s journey to the Master`s title
When we think of competitions, we often imagine sports, music, or other well-known arenas. But what about the competition to be the best server? Mathias, Norway’s champion in the field of waiting and restaurant manager at Oslo Military Society, shows us that perfection and passion can be taken to a whole new level—even in the art of service.
In our latest podcast episode, we dive into what drives Mathias to compete and excel in his job. From his first nerve-wracking competitions to building an enormous following on TikTok with over 226,000 followers, he shares how he has used social media to inspire and educate. Here is a man who doesn’t just serve food but also captivates and educates his audience with humor and professionalism.
Mathias also shares his best tips for inner motivation:
- Set small, clear goals that give you direction.
- Embrace your mistakes—they are the stepping stones to success.
- Find your passion and cultivate it, even if it means spilling wine now and then.
This episode is perfect for anyone looking to learn more about personal development, handling pressure, and building a professional image without losing authenticity. Tune in to discover how Mathias has managed to combine his competitive spirit with passion and humor to create a unique career.
Call to action: Listen to the podcast her…
Knowledge Industry vs. Self-Education Industry: A Showdown (7 minutes of your life well spent)

First things first: let’s define the playing field.
The Knowledge Industry is the cool cousin in your professional family, dealing with sectors that produce, refine, and distribute the most powerful substance known to humankind: knowledge. We’re talking education, R&D, IT solutions that make your brain hurt just thinking about them, and those elite consultants who probably charge per second.
Then, there’s the Self-Education Industry. Imagine all the DIY enthusiasts but for learning—people pursuing knowledge outside traditional classrooms, armed with Wi-Fi and too much caffeine. This is the space of online courses, e-books, webinars, video tutorials, and apps. It’s like Hogwarts for grown-ups who want to learn accounting or advanced salsa from their couch.
The Good, the Bad, and the “Why Am I Doing This?” of Self-Education
The Pros:
- Flexibility that fits around your chaotic life.
- Customizable learning paths that don’t require a thousand-page syllabus.
- Skills are as fresh as that “first day of school” outfit.
The Cons:
- Quality control that sometimes makes you wonder if your instructor just Googled the syllabus.
- The paradox of choice—too many courses make you click on Netflix instead.
- Lack of hand-holding, which can be great until you’re metaphorically drowning in educational PDFs.
The Titans: Udemy and Coursera
Udemy is like the Walmart of online learning. Need to know how to code? Check. Want to learn underwater basket weaving? Double-check. With over 100,000 courses, there’s something for everyone, and most courses are priced in that sweet $25-$200 range. But watch out: anyone can teach, so sometimes it’s more “Steve from accounting shares Excel tips” than “Professor from MIT breaks down quantum physics.”
Coursera, on the other hand, is Udemy’s more academic, snooty sibling. Backed by universities and offering everything from certificates to degrees, Coursera boasts partnerships with over 100 Fortune 500 companies and 82 million students. The downside? It can lean more theoretical, so you might learn the art of persuasion but still not convince your dog to stop barking at 3 a.m.
Why Coaches and Mentors Should Care – “Ah, I see” moments for mentors and coaches
Now, why am I, a man who prefers deep conversations and caffeine to trends, waxing poetic about the Knowledge Industry? Because, my friends, this trend could be your ticket to a bigger impact (and, let’s be honest, a healthier bank account).
Three key benefits for coaches and mentors:
- Staying Updated: The Knowledge Industry is like a buffet for your brain. Want to learn the newest techniques in motivational interviewing? Need a brush-up on emotional intelligence? There’s a course (or ten) for that.
- Building Expertise: Specialization is the name of the game. Why not position yourself as “the coach who conquered executive coaching” or the mentor known for mindfulness workshops that leave participants Zen’d out?
- Monetizing Your Knowledge: Why not throw your hat into the self-education ring by developing your own course? Be the Udemy instructor you wish you’d had.
Mark Your Digital Territory
Let’s talk about social media, the necessary evil. If you’re not using it, you’re basically coaching in a void. Here’s how to stop lurking and start thriving:
Pro tips:
- Know Your Audience: LinkedIn for the suit-and-tie crowd, Instagram for those who live on avocado toast.
- Make Your Profile Pop: Ditch the selfie and bring on the pro headshots. No one trusts life advice from someone with an angle that screams, “My arm is my tripod.”
- Engage, Engage, Engage: Social media is a two-way street. Reply to comments, share insights, and don’t be afraid to slide into relevant DMs (professionally, of course).
And don’t underestimate the power of video content—people love seeing a face behind the tips. It builds trust faster than a free coaching session.
The Final Countdown: Online Presence Matters (because who doesn’t want to be found?)
To wrap up, here’s why you need an online presence:
- Visibility: The more you show up online, the more likely you’ll be found by someone who really, really needs your expertise.
- Credibility: Sharing knowledge makes people trust you. Sharing success stories makes them want to trust you.
- Scalability: With an online footprint, you can go from coaching 10 people a month to inspiring thousands with webinars, online courses, and e-books.
In conclusion, the Knowledge and Self-Education industries are like the Wild West, full of opportunities waiting for coaches and mentors who dare to explore. So saddle up, build that online profile, and start sharing your brilliance. Your future clients are just a course or social media post away from finding you.
SoMe strategy plan
I have been struggling for how to reach my audience and wondering if it’s important to have as many followers as possible or what.
The first thing they all say is that you have to start by understanding who you’re audience are and optimizing your profile to appeal directly to them. Ok, but when you have private people, businesses, schools/universities it’s not that easy.
And then they say that I should have a focus on creating high-quality, consistent content and actively engage with your followers through comments and user-generated content. Well I am doing my best here…
So I did something that many recommend, I asked IA, and wow what an answer. I was kind of blown away…
In seconds I had Defind my goals and objectives, had an audience analysis, content strategy/pillar, a posting schedule, a hashtag strategy and an engagement strategy. So I promise to do it and become better, also in here in my blog.
The Only Thing You Need is to Die – Embracing Life’s Most Morbid Truth
When it comes to old sayings, few are as jarring and straight-to-the-point as: “The only thing you need is to die.” It’s not the kind of phrase that inspires warm fuzzy feelings, but stick with me—there’s more to this dark nugget of wisdom than meets the eye. It’s existentially charged, culturally deep, and even, dare I say, oddly empowering. So, buckle up as we dive into why acknowledging this stark truth might just be the most liberating thing you do today.
Why This Phrase Packs a Punch
First off, let’s not sugarcoat it: when someone drops “The only thing you need is to die” at the dinner table, it’s a conversation stopper. But why does it hit so hard? The answer is simple: it’s true. Death is the one constant, the one guarantee in life. Everything else—your job, relationships, ambitions, anxieties—those are negotiable, mutable, and optional. Death? Non-negotiable.
At first glance, that’s terrifying. But dig a little deeper, and it’s an invitation to strip life down to its bare essentials. If the only thing we’re required to do is die, what are we doing with all the rest of our time here? We’re free to decide, and that’s where this edgy piece of wisdom starts to feel a little… hopeful.
The Philosophy Behind It: Sartre Would Be Proud
Let’s get a bit academic for a second. This phrase sits comfortably within the realm of existentialism, a philosophical school of thought championed by big-brained luminaries like Jean-Paul Sartre and Albert Camus. Sartre would probably raise a glass of red wine and smirk at “The only thing you need is to die” because it’s a stark reminder of what he believed most passionately: life has no preordained meaning, and it’s up to us to create one.
Think about it: if death is the only certainty, then the rest of life is a vast playground of choice. Sure, it’s a playground with rusted swings and existential dread lurking behind the slide, but it’s a playground nonetheless. You can shape your life any way you want, and while that freedom is exhilarating, it’s also heavy with responsibility. Every choice you make—or don’t make—carves out what your life will mean.
So, How Do We Make Choices That Matter?
Alright, you get it: life is a blank canvas, death is inevitable, and Sartre is smirking somewhere. But what does that mean for the choices you make? The trick lies in realizing that if dying is the only real “must,” then everything else you think you have to do is just noise.
Many of us live our lives tangled in a web of perceived obligations. I have to get that promotion. I need to meet societal standards. I should settle down because everyone else is. But if death is the only true endpoint, all those other “musts” are actually choices—choices you are free to accept or reject.
When you remember that life’s only unavoidable event is its end, you can start making decisions that align more closely with what you actually want. Want to quit that high-paying job and open a llama sanctuary? Weird, but go for it. Prefer traveling the world over planting roots? Do it. The only box you absolutely must check on the to-do list of life is “be mortal”—everything else is up to you.
Death Awareness: Your New Best Friend?
Okay, so calling death awareness your “best friend” is a bit much, but humor me. There’s a psychological concept called death awareness that suggests accepting the reality of death can actually lead to a richer, more fulfilling life. When you fully acknowledge that your time here is limited, every moment becomes more precious. The small stuff (read: Karen from HR’s passive-aggressive emails) suddenly feels inconsequential, while the big stuff (meaningful connections, personal growth, inner peace) takes center stage.
Sure, living with death awareness sounds morbid. But it’s like adding salt to chocolate—it balances the flavor and makes life’s sweet moments all the richer.
Creating Meaning in a “Must-Die” World
If life comes with no preloaded meaning, it’s up to you to make your own. This realization can be daunting, but it’s also what makes life an art form. You get to experiment, screw up, pivot, and create something entirely unique.
Albert Camus, another existential heavyweight, said, “The struggle itself toward the heights is enough to fill a man’s heart. One must imagine Sisyphus happy.” If that ancient rock-roller can find purpose in endless toil, surely we can find meaning in the variety of choices we make, fueled by the knowledge that our time is finite.
Final Thoughts: Why This Morbid Truth Might Save You
So, where does this leave us? Right back at that unsettling phrase: “The only thing you need is to die.” It’s not just an invitation to be nihilistic; it’s an invitation to be free. Free to make choices that resonate with who you are, not what the world expects. Free to let go of societal scripts and choose the path that makes you feel alive.
Embrace that death is the only certainty, and use it as a compass to make your choices count. Build a life that, when you’re nearing the one and only thing you need to do, makes you smile at the strange, beautiful mess you’ve created.
And remember: if all else fails, you’re free to set up that llama sanctuary. Because why not?
Christmas wishes from Mentorguru
I wish all my readers, clients, mentees and listeners to my podcast «The talk-by Mentorguru» a peaceful Christmas and all the best wishes for 2024.
Getting your best year in 2024
If you are like me you are using the time in the end of a year to prepare making your next year even better.
So starting a new year with the intention of making it your best year ever involves a combination of reflection, goal-setting, and intentional action. Here’s five steps to help you get started:
- Reflect on the Past Year:
Take some time to reflect on the previous year. What were your achievements, challenges, and lessons learned? Understanding your past can help you make informed decisions for the future. - Set Clear Goals:
Define specific, measurable, achievable, relevant, and time-bound (SMART) goals for the year. Break down larger goals into smaller, more manageable tasks to make progress more achievable. - Develop Positive Habits:
Identify habits that contribute to your well-being and success. Establish a routine that incorporates these habits into your daily life. Consistency is key in forming new, positive habits - Develop Healthy Habits:
Consider adopting habits that contribute to your overall well-being. This could include regular exercise, a balanced diet, sufficient sleep, and mindfulness practices. Healthy habits provide a strong foundation for achieving your goals. - Take Action:
The most important step is to take action. Start working on your goals today, even if it’s with small steps. Consistent action is key to making progress and turning your aspirations into reality.
Remember, making it your best year ever is a process, not an overnight achievement. Stay committed, stay positive, and stay focused on your goals. Celebrate the small victories along the way, and keep moving forward.
And good luck for 2024