When it comes to old sayings, few are as jarring and straight-to-the-point as: “The only thing you need is to die.” It’s not the kind of phrase that inspires warm fuzzy feelings, but stick with me—there’s more to this dark nugget of wisdom than meets the eye. It’s existentially charged, culturally deep, and even, dare I say, oddly empowering. So, buckle up as we dive into why acknowledging this stark truth might just be the most liberating thing you do today.
Why This Phrase Packs a Punch
First off, let’s not sugarcoat it: when someone drops “The only thing you need is to die” at the dinner table, it’s a conversation stopper. But why does it hit so hard? The answer is simple: it’s true. Death is the one constant, the one guarantee in life. Everything else—your job, relationships, ambitions, anxieties—those are negotiable, mutable, and optional. Death? Non-negotiable.
At first glance, that’s terrifying. But dig a little deeper, and it’s an invitation to strip life down to its bare essentials. If the only thing we’re required to do is die, what are we doing with all the rest of our time here? We’re free to decide, and that’s where this edgy piece of wisdom starts to feel a little… hopeful.
The Philosophy Behind It: Sartre Would Be Proud
Let’s get a bit academic for a second. This phrase sits comfortably within the realm of existentialism, a philosophical school of thought championed by big-brained luminaries like Jean-Paul Sartre and Albert Camus. Sartre would probably raise a glass of red wine and smirk at “The only thing you need is to die” because it’s a stark reminder of what he believed most passionately: life has no preordained meaning, and it’s up to us to create one.
Think about it: if death is the only certainty, then the rest of life is a vast playground of choice. Sure, it’s a playground with rusted swings and existential dread lurking behind the slide, but it’s a playground nonetheless. You can shape your life any way you want, and while that freedom is exhilarating, it’s also heavy with responsibility. Every choice you make—or don’t make—carves out what your life will mean.
So, How Do We Make Choices That Matter?
Alright, you get it: life is a blank canvas, death is inevitable, and Sartre is smirking somewhere. But what does that mean for the choices you make? The trick lies in realizing that if dying is the only real “must,” then everything else you think you have to do is just noise.
Many of us live our lives tangled in a web of perceived obligations. I have to get that promotion. I need to meet societal standards. I should settle down because everyone else is. But if death is the only true endpoint, all those other “musts” are actually choices—choices you are free to accept or reject.
When you remember that life’s only unavoidable event is its end, you can start making decisions that align more closely with what you actually want. Want to quit that high-paying job and open a llama sanctuary? Weird, but go for it. Prefer traveling the world over planting roots? Do it. The only box you absolutely must check on the to-do list of life is “be mortal”—everything else is up to you.
Death Awareness: Your New Best Friend?
Okay, so calling death awareness your “best friend” is a bit much, but humor me. There’s a psychological concept called death awareness that suggests accepting the reality of death can actually lead to a richer, more fulfilling life. When you fully acknowledge that your time here is limited, every moment becomes more precious. The small stuff (read: Karen from HR’s passive-aggressive emails) suddenly feels inconsequential, while the big stuff (meaningful connections, personal growth, inner peace) takes center stage.
Sure, living with death awareness sounds morbid. But it’s like adding salt to chocolate—it balances the flavor and makes life’s sweet moments all the richer.
Creating Meaning in a “Must-Die” World
If life comes with no preloaded meaning, it’s up to you to make your own. This realization can be daunting, but it’s also what makes life an art form. You get to experiment, screw up, pivot, and create something entirely unique.
Albert Camus, another existential heavyweight, said, “The struggle itself toward the heights is enough to fill a man’s heart. One must imagine Sisyphus happy.” If that ancient rock-roller can find purpose in endless toil, surely we can find meaning in the variety of choices we make, fueled by the knowledge that our time is finite.
Final Thoughts: Why This Morbid Truth Might Save You
So, where does this leave us? Right back at that unsettling phrase: “The only thing you need is to die.” It’s not just an invitation to be nihilistic; it’s an invitation to be free. Free to make choices that resonate with who you are, not what the world expects. Free to let go of societal scripts and choose the path that makes you feel alive.
Embrace that death is the only certainty, and use it as a compass to make your choices count. Build a life that, when you’re nearing the one and only thing you need to do, makes you smile at the strange, beautiful mess you’ve created.
And remember: if all else fails, you’re free to set up that llama sanctuary. Because why not?
If you don't have a mentor or coach, but you wanted to try to coach yourself. Is it possible? Yes it is, but much harder than if you get a mentor or coach.
It may sound strange to you, but working with obstacles is often where you really get to know yourself. This is also where you find a deeper and more honest path to your goals. You can try the following exercise: