5 Things I’ve learned from writing my two first books

Research says that 81% of us wants to write a book someday; I am one of them. I can cross this goal off of my bucket list in, my first was published in 2007 and I renew the design in 2009, my second book got first out in 2010 and was renewed in 2012.

I started with mentoring in 1999 and I saw very quickly that a kind of book was missing, well maybe not the book itself. But something to put down ideas and thoughts from meetings with the mentor or maybe in trainings.

In the beginning I used a binder but wanted it to be smaller, to fit in a bag or maybe a (a bit big) pocket. And in the end the book is 5.83 wide x 8.26 tall, the perfect size.

But on to what I have learned.

1. Know why the book is needed. Know the reason why you want to write and why the book is necessary. And, knowing ‘why’ will help you stay with it when it gets hard —and it will.

2. Self-publish or traditional publisher. No doubt that traditional publisher can help you with a lot of things, but they also have opinions on the book. In my experience my traditional publisher wanted to change a very important thing in the book, and I refused to do it. So therefore I decided to self-publish the book.

3. Research. Don´t get stuck in research, because it’s very easy to do so. I read over 30 books and ended up in circle, and nothing was new. There were 3-4 “truths” about mentoring and all the books was about one of them.

4. Writing process. I pictured myself sitting in a cozy coffee shop finding the perfect words, but find myself having glory days and not so glory 

days. And especially because I self-publish no-one was hanging over me with a deadline.

5. Sales process. As an self-publisher you are on your own when it comes to sales, logistics and others. I found www.lulu.com very helpful and getting me to www.amazone.com and http://www.barnesandnoble.com And also they have different marketing pack so you can buy the advice you need to sell the book.

If you want to start with something a bit smaller project than a book, why don´t you start with a blog.

I use WordPress and I find it easy to use.

Good luck with your writing…

A new year coming up

2013 is soon over and I have been a blogger for 5 year (started in june 2008). And every year I start with a blog post about personal planning and how to plan your year, because I believe in planning and working towards a goal.

And this year is now exception, and in december I wrote about Powerful development plan  , go in and see what you think about that one. Or of course you can use this on – that is last years.

Regardless the planning or not I want to wish you HAPPY CHRISTMAS AND A HAPPY NEW YEAR

Is it time for a reinvention?

The new buzz word, at least in Norway, is reinvention. Use one week as an hell week and do things you normally don´t do, which I find very interesting. Many people does the same thing day after day, and some even expect different results.

As Albert Einstein said:

«Insanity: doing the same thing over and over again-and then expect different results.»

You can not keep doing exactly the same as you do every day, yet expect different results. You can not continue to perform the same routines in action, word and thought every day and expect to see changes in your life. Your life will change in the extent of your actions and thoughts change.

SO, if you feeling stuck? Or inspired? Today offers you the perfect opportunity to take stock of your life. One thing is certain… maintaining the status quo is not an option.

You can also compare it to your business and reinvention has resulted in some of the world’s greatest business success stories. Companies that launch with the intention to do one thing often end up finding their grand opportunity lies in a completely different direction. Taking advantage of the opportunity requires a reinvention of thought and strategy—and the effort pays off. For instance, as a startup, Flickr was an online game project and chat room…

Soon it will be new years eve and a perfect time to relax with the family and good friends and think about 2014. How can you get your best year ever, or maybe why won´t you have your best year ever. It´s your choice…

Do we need to train mentees?

I am a strong believer of training in a mentoring program. I believe that mentoring programmes is failing if they forget to train mentees. Also Professor David Clutterbuck, one of the most know people about mentoring, believes the same and he says that a Program that train only mentors deliver less than half the benefits, on average, than those that train both participants. It´s important to train the mentee´s in f.ex how to use your mentor, and to start the personal development thinking…

 

Here are some of the reasons:

• Mentees’ often have little experience of mentoring and come with unrealistic expectations – for example, expecting to be sponsored. When those expectations aren’t met, they tend to be frustrated and blame the process (or the mentor)

• Mentees need to drive the process, for it to work properly. Without training, they often lack the confidence to be proactive in managing the relationship and/ or to inject sufficient positive challenge into the learning conversations

• Mentoring requires a relatively high level of dialogue, as opposed to discussion or debate.

Effective training provides the skills to engage in and sustain learning dialogue. Without this, conversations tend to focus on the shallow and on tactical issues, or on transfer of basic skills, rather than on developing insight and personal capability

• The techniques that effective mentors use are most effective when the mentee understands what is happening and is both comfortable with and able to cooperate with the process

• Briefings don’t work. People need time to discuss, reflect and practice their role and behaviours as a mentee, and to modify their expectations

• Research strongly associates mentee training with both mentors’ and mentees’ subsequent perception of relationship quality

• Mentees, who have not received training, tend to report feeling unsupported as programme participants. This in turn affects their commitment to the programme and the mentoring relationship

• Training helps mentees perceive the relationship from other perspectives – in particular, that of the organisation and their mentors

• Successful mentoring is strongly associated with a sense of relationship and programme purpose – that sense tends to be much weaker in relationships, where the mentee has not attended training

In environments, where mentors and mentees are from different cultural backgrounds, training is even more vital. Expectations about how the relationship should be conducted, where the boundaries are, what success will look like and so on are likely to be very different – so people need time and opportunity to reflect on these matters. (In a south-east Asian operation of an oil company, for example, expectations of expatriate mentors and indigenous mentees were almost total opposites.)

 

How much training is needed? 

Recommended good practice is at least one day initially, followed up by two or more opportunities over the year to explore how they are using the relationship and what they can do to help their mentor be more effective in helping them.

 

Read the original article here:

http://www.davidclutterbuckpartnership.com/why-do-we-need-to-train-mentees/

Word of today – Mentorship

Each day I get a small video from John Maxwell, it´s called «A minute with Maxwell» and today it was about mentoring. So I had to put it out on my web

Today’s «A Minute with Maxwell» video lesson was filmed during my Live Event in Orlando, Florida where I spent three days with my team members that are a part of my John C. Maxwell Coach, Speaker and Teacher Certification Program.

Here is the video

 

Here is more about John Maxwell

  • Best-selling author of over 74 books
  • Legendary speaker worldwide
  • Global trainer of 6 million leaders in over 176 countries

And his «A Minute with Maxwell» is like a path to success. It’s a video coaching program where I come along side of you each day, teach you the meaning of a word and add value to your life. And then you can ‘spread the word’ and inspire others around the world. Just one word a day can make a big difference in your life-and those of many others!»

His webpage is:

Jim Maxwell

Getting the Most out of Mentoring – Part II

I strongly believe in the power of mentoring in developing leaders. During my years with mentoring I have found that there are things you can, as a mentee, can do to get the most out of the mentoring sessions. Here is some questions you can use in each part.

MENTOR-model:

M – meet
E – explore
N – needs and requirement
T – time and resources
O – options
R – review

 

 

Meet

• What expectations do you have for this MM-meeting?

• Are there any particular topics you want to talk about?

• What would be a good outcome of this MM-meeting for you?

 

Explore

• What is the problem that you want to talk to me about?

• What is going to happen that is not happening now, or what you do not want to happen?

• Describe how the problem manifests itself in daily life and the story behind

• When and how often does that happen?

• How would others describe the situation?

• What have you done and what has worked / – not worked?

 

Needs and requirement

• What has been new in the course of the conversation?

• What will you take next?

• What will it take for you to try what we have talked about?

• What is positive and what is negative in this solution?

 

Time and resources

• What can I do as a mentor to help you further?

• Is there someone who can help you, if so who?

• What do you need to reach your goal?

 

Options

• Will there be of real value to you?

• Can you get on now?

 

Review

• What is the most important thing you bring from our meeting?

• How specific plan do you have now?

• Let us summarize the key points

A powerful Personal Development Plan

Personal Development Plans can often be “something and nothing” – a paper exercise, but they can also be useful. I am a big promoter of writing plans and has put a yearly plan each january. But when are all the plans at their best?

  • Identify clearly the difference between where you are now and where you want and/or need to be
  • Link immediate (short-term) objectives and actions with longer-term, wider personal goals
  • Have both a developmental (learning) perspective and a career management perspective
  • Provide an appropriate level of stretch
  • Are motivating and create a bias for action
  • Are shared with your support network
  • Can be monitored to check that progress is happening and how fast it is happening

 

Some useful questions to ask 

Why do I want this?

How does this goal align with my personal values?

How does it align with the values of the organization?

What will I do when I have reached my goals? How should I celebrate?

Podcast – 7 Mentorship Guidelines

The project Box is one of the world´s only Human Performance Management Company, focusing exclusively in the field Project Management, Sales and Social Media. But they have also made a podcast about mentoring. Bernard Tirado talks about the type of mentors and 7 guidelines either you are being a mentee or a mentor.

 

Link to podcast is here:

http://www.theprojectbox.us/2012/02/7-mentorship-guidelines/