The Formula for Failure and Success by Jim Rohn

I find this article in my mailbox the other day, read it it´s good.

Failure is not a single, cataclysmic event. We do not fail overnight. Failure is the inevitable result of an accumulation of poor thinking and poor choices. To put it more simply, failure is nothing more than a few errors in judgment repeated every day. Now why would someone make an error in judgment and then be so foolish as to repeat it every day?

The answer is because he or she does not think that it matters.

On their own, our daily acts do not seem that important. A minor oversight, a poor decision, or a wasted hour generally doesn’t result in an instant and measurable impact. More often than not, we escape from any immediate consequences of our deeds.

If we have not bothered to read a single book in the past ninety days, this lack of discipline does not seem to have any immediate impact on our lives. And since nothing drastic happened to us after the first ninety days, we repeat this error in judgment for another ninety days, and on and on it goes. Why? Because it doesn’t seem to matter. And herein lies the great danger. Far worse than not reading the books is not even realizing that it matters!

Those who eat too many of the wrong foods are contributing to a future health problem, but the joy of the moment overshadows the consequence of the future. It does not seem to matter. Those who smoke too much or drink too much go on making these poor choices year after year after year… because it doesn’t seem to matter. But the pain and regret of these errors in judgment have only been delayed for a future time. Consequences are seldom instant; instead, they accumulate until the inevitable day of reckoning finally arrives and the price must be paid for our poor choices – choices that didn’t seem to matter.

Failure’s most dangerous attribute is its subtlety. In the short term those little errors don’t seem to make any difference. We do not seem to be failing. In fact, sometimes these accumulated errors in judgment occur throughout a period of great joy and prosperity in our lives. Since nothing terrible happens to us, since there are no instant consequences to capture our attention, we simply drift from one day to the next, repeating the errors, thinking the wrong thoughts, listening to the wrong voices and making the wrong choices. The sky did not fall in on us yesterday; therefore the act was probably harmless. Since it seemed to have no measurable consequence, it is probably safe to repeat.

But we must become better educated than that!

If at the end of the day when we made our first error in judgment the sky had fallen in on us, we undoubtedly would have taken immediate steps to ensure that the act would never be repeated again. Like the child who places his hand on a hot burner despite his parents’ warnings, we would have had an instantaneous experience accompanying our error in judgment.

Unfortunately, failure does not shout out its warnings as our parents once did. This is why it is imperative to refine our philosophy in order to be able to make better choices. With a powerful, personal philosophy guiding our every step, we become more aware of our errors in judgment and more aware that each error really does matter.

Now here is the great news. Just like the formula for failure, the formula for success is easy to follow: It’s a few simple disciplines practiced every day.

Now here is an interesting question worth pondering: How can we change the errors in the formula for failure into the disciplines required in the formula for success? The answer is by making the future an important part of our current philosophy.

Both success and failure involve future consequences, namely the inevitable rewards or unavoidable regrets resulting from past activities. If this is true, why don’t more people take time to ponder the future? The answer is simple: They are so caught up in the current moment that it doesn’t seem to matter. The problems and the rewards of today are so absorbing to some human beings that they never pause long enough to think about tomorrow.

But what if we did develop a new discipline to take just a few minutes every day to look a little further down the road? We would then be able to foresee the impending consequences of our current conduct. Armed with that valuable information, we would be able to take the necessary action to change our errors into new success-oriented disciplines. In other words, by disciplining ourselves to see the future in advance, we would be able to change our thinking, amend our errors and develop new habits to replace the old.

One of the exciting things about the formula for success – a few simple disciplines practiced every day – is that the results are almost immediate. As we voluntarily change daily errors into daily disciplines, we experience positive results in a very short period of time. When we change our diet, our health improves noticeably in just a few weeks. When we start exercising, we feel a new vitality almost immediately. When we begin reading, we experience a growing awareness and a new level of self-confidence. Whatever new discipline we begin to practice daily will produce exciting results that will drive us to become even better at developing new disciplines.

The real magic of new disciplines is that they will cause us to amend our thinking. If we were to start today to read the books, keep a journal, attend the classes, listen more and observe more, then today would be the first day of a new life leading to a better future. If we were to start today to try harder, and in every way make a conscious and consistent effort to change subtle and deadly errors into constructive and rewarding disciplines, we would never again settle for a life of existence – not once we have tasted the fruits of a life of substance!

To Lead, Start with Yourself

As a leader I frequently get asked the question:

What is my greatest accomplishment— the greatest thing I have ever seen happen as a leader?

And after reading an Earl Nightingale article he titled “The Greatest Things,” I thought I would compile my own list of a leader’s greatest “things.”

The list I am going to share with you over the next few months is very subjective. I suggest that after I share them with you, you do your own assessment—because there is no right or wrong answer. What I am giving you is my own subjective and personal thinking on leadership. So let’s get started with the first one.

The Leader’s Greatest Victory—Victory over Self

My greatest victory every day is victory over self. I don’t want to put this in past tense because this is a daily battle I have to fight. Not a day goes by where I don’t have to work on myself and battle the temptations of self.

When people think of leadership, the common thought is a leader’s greatest victory is with others. That is a normal and understandable thought process. Because what do leaders do? They lead others. They are taking people someplace, right?

Read more of the article «Maximum Leadership» from John C. Maxwell right here at this link:

www.successmagazine.com/john-maxwell-leadership/PARAMS/article/924

Enjoy!

Kick-Start Your Year

You have less than three weeks until the start of 2010. If you want the year ahead to be filled with goal achievements instead of unfulfilled resolutions, you need to answer this question: What are you going to do now to make sure you have the best year ever?

If you want your year to begin with a kick-start instead of a whimper, follow our expert advice:

«Expand your thinking with new experiences. Each month for 30 days in a row, commit to doing something new that you have thought about doing but have not done, and notice how it affects your life. Some possibilities: verbally appreciate 10 people per day, don’t read the newspaper, get eight hours of sleep or plan your next day’s schedule.»
—Jack Canfield, co-founder of Chicken Soup for the Soul series

«Build value every day. People do business with people they trust and people who make them feel special. Create a ritual that ensures you reach out to three possible or current customers every day.»

—Robin Sharma, leadership expert and author of The Leader Who Had No Title

«Create an environment fostering your success. You might not even realize to what extent you are influenced—negatively and positively—by things and people around you. Start a journal to keep track of these influences so you can eliminate the negative and increase the positive. For example, nurture your emotional well-being by choosing friends who genuinely want you to succeed and who encourage you.»

—Tony Alessandra, sales expert and author of The New Art of Managing People

«Be a student of all you do. Become an expert in your field through reading. Start today by identifying areas for improvement, looking for training opportunities in your field and seeking out people you’d like to emulate.»

—Stedman Graham, speaker and author of You Can Make It Happen: A Nine-Step Plan for Success

Find 40 more ways to kick-start your year here…

This article is written for Success Magazine

What To Talk About When There’s Nothing To Talk About

In the time-poor environment that we have created, mentorees are very concerned about wasting their mentor’s time. Mentorees are often hesitant to contact their mentor or schedule meetings when they have no burning issue to discuss. This is a mistake.

You might feel there’s no point meeting at times when you have no problems. When you are working toward longer-term goals and are progressing but have no current actions or outcomes to discuss, a meeting may seem unnecessary. And it’s easy to skip meeting if you are very busy with day-to-day activities and haven’t focused on your personal development since the last mentoring conversation.

It is good to have an agenda for mentoring conversations, even if it’s just a few bullet points, because it shows respect for the mentor’s time, it helps maintain focus and provides both parties with a sense of accomplishment and completion. However, a lack of an agenda should not stop a mentoring conversation. Mentors may need to take the lead to reassure their partner of their commitment because mentoring conversations when it seems «there’s nothing to talk about» may be vital.


No Problem
Mentoring conversations are not just about solving problems or making decisions. They are about the availability of a person, with whom to have a conversation that provokes creative and critical thinking. A key benefit of mentoring is the relationship. However, the relationship needs to be established and well maintained if problems or important decisions are to be confidently shared when they do arise.

Conversations about what is going well are extremely useful too. Celebrating success is not simply a feel-good exercise. The purpose of mentoring is to create and capture insight, then use it. Reviewing positive outcomes and satisfaction will reveal and reinforce the constructive behaviours that led to success and clarify personal values and priorities. By listening and questioning a mentor can facilitate much greater awareness and positive actions that will enhance the mentoree’s life.

Long-term Goals
People often use mentoring to identify career direction and work towards it. These goals are not usually achieved over night but as a result of specific actions over time. So naturally, there will be pauses between. In a mentoring program over a finite period, the early momentum can come to a halt after initial action steps are implemented. Some mentoring relationships can survive long gaps between contacts but some won’t. People wonder how best to get value in the interim.

It is useful to have a «default agenda» a standard format that produces constructive conversation. This could be as simple as reviewing the week/fortnight/month’s highlights and low points and accomplishments. The mentor may ask a series of questions that prompt reflection and learning, such as: «what’s working well for you, right now?» and «what could be improved?» My mentor asks: «what is your greatest challenge, right now?» A new, short-term goal and actions, or at least awareness and focus, often result.

Personal Development
No matter what qualifications, age or career stage one has achieved, on-going personal development is a must. Even if an individual development plan negotiated with a manager, linked to performance appraisal and formalised, taking personal responsibility for self-directed learning and development is essential. It is easy, to let the demands of day-to-day work and hectic life style get in the way of personal aspirations and our growth as a human being. If we lose sight of what is truly important, if we have no sense of purpose, life can become a meaningless round of chores interspersed with moments of instant gratification.

Mentoring conversations are all about discovering meaning and purpose – for mentors as well as mentorees. The mentor might share his or her own life-lessons and insights that led to personal development. This can be immensely valuable to both parties .

The social support offered by relationships, should not be underestimated in the too-busy life so many of us lead. When you don’t have time, or have nothing to talk about may be exactly the time to have a mentoring conversation! Investing time really communicating another human being, taking time out to pause and reflect or simply stoping to smell the roses (or the coffee) is never a waste of time! That’s how mentoring works.

The author of this article is Ann Rolfe, and was first published in 2010 on www.mentoring-works.com.

Five Benefits of Working with a Coach or Mentor

Being a leader can be a really lonely existence.  Expectations are high and it can often be a real struggle to stay on top of your game and continually deliver great results.  Continuing to develop as a leader has never been so vital not least because of the major challenges facing many organisations right now.

For those at a more senior level working with a coach or mentor is often a great way of continuing to develop.  So what are the benefits?

Benefit 1: Thinking time

The pace at which leaders operate in organisations is often relentless and means that there is little or no time to stand back and take stock.  Being able to stand back from issues and challenges allows you to clearly think through the choices, look at challenges in different ways and ultimately to take better decisions.  And if you are taking better decisions it means better results for you personally and the organisation.

Benefit 2: Ongoing support

Training is great and I have been to many great training courses over the years.  Trouble is most training courses are a one shot opportunity.  What I mean by that is that you go along to the course, leave enthusiastic and an few months later find you are back where you started.  If you are a leader looking to be more effective over the long term you know that it is going to take time.  Having that ongoing support can help you make that sustained change in performance.

Benefit 3: Personal attention

In my experience of working with clients there are often some very specific areas of focus that leaders and managers want to work on.  Sometimes it might be about strategies and tactics that they can apply and other times it might be tackling areas of self doubt or misconceptions.  I also notice that they rarely need to work on all aspects of a particular topic but more on one or two areas.   The nature of the relationship means that it is much easier to tailor the programme to meet specific needs.

Benefit 4: Highly time efficient

I know that when I was in leadership and management roles, creating the time to attend a 2 or 3 day course was often a real challenge.  By comparison finding a couple of hours a month to work with a coach was much more time efficient and effective.

Benefit 5: Return on Investment

Ultimately if you are investing time, money and energy into something the return on what you have invested will be important.  Research into the benefits of coaching indicates that the return on investment is in the region of 500-700%.  Now these numbers might well look huge but let’s take a look at an example.  Imagine you are a senior manager who aspires to be a Director.  Ask yourself what’s the difference in salary and benefits?  In a field like accountancy, the differential between a number one and number two can easily be in the £30-50,000 per annum range.  If you are in the number one job for say 10 years, that could mean an extra £300-£500,000 to your earnings.  So look at your investment in terms of the lifetime value.

Bottom Line – Continuing to develop as a leader is no longer an optional extra.  If you are serious about realising your professional and personal potential, working with a coach or mentor might just be the catalyst.

How To Maintain The Momentum Of Mentoring

Mentoring program coordinators need to have ongoing communication with participants to stimulate engagement, motivation and answer questions or concerns. But how do you keep up the contact in a useful and interesting way? Many successful programs send regular Mentoring Works Tips.

Mentoring Tips could be one page, easy to read and practical. They should be designed for mentors and suitable for mentorees and managers. Consistently delivering Mentoring Tips:

  • Provides mentors with information, tools and motivation
  • Keeps mentorees engaged in the process
  • Informs managers of mentoring techniques and benefits

 

The author of this article is Ann Rolfe, and was first published 10. november 2010 on www.mentoring-works.com.

Working book for the mentee

Last week my latest book for the mentee was finished and came from print. I use «print on demand» and www.lulu.com

The book looked very god in the new design, and I have started on translate it to english. I have a good friend in the US who will do it for me. As a lawyer, writer and trainer he knows what to do.

For now the book is in norwegian, just send me an email if you want to order.

The price is Euro 16,25 + shipping.

Is Your Mentoring Strategy Working?

I got this article in a newsletter, and had to bring it on my blog.

Mentoring aims to deliver strategic value for the organisation as well as personal benefits for individuals. How can you ensure that your mentoring strategy achieves these outcomes?

The critical first step is to clarify the strategic purpose of mentoring – why is mentoring important? Without clear, and meaningful goals, you may find it hard to gain support for mentoring, difficult to promote the value of mentoring and challenging to make it a priority for people.

To ensure your mentoring strategy works you have to answer the question «why mentoring?» First, you need to uncover the needs, wants and issues that mentoring will address from the perspective of the organisation and the people you want involved. Then, you can plan your mentoring strategy to deliver specific outcomes; and finally, you’ll be able to communicate the reasons for mentoring in a language that make sense to each group of stakeholders.

What Does The Organisation Need?

Most often, mentoring is used by organisations striving for:

  • Employee engagement – to attract, retain and develop people for increased productivity;
  • Knowledge management/skill building – to prevent the loss of both tacit and implicit information and develop skills, for improved capability; or
  • Culture change to influence behaviour based on values, assumptions, and common practice, for enhanced organisational performance.

You’ll need to find out exactly what the pressing needs are and be able to clearly show the impact mentoring could make. This might mean presenting a business case and/or linking to the organisational mission and values.

Why Should People Prioritise Mentoring?

You may be targeting a specific group with your mentoring strategy such as: graduates, women, emerging leaders, innovators, young professionals or indigenous people, however you need people who are not directly involved, as well as those who are, to prioritise mentoring. If they don’t it may be derailed by obstruction, competing demands or lack of support.

This is a time for two-way, rather than one-way communication. We have to get out there and listen. We can’t simply impose mentoring on people because we think it’s a good idea. They won’t buy it unless there is a personal reason that overrides other priorities. So, you will have to discover the needs, concerns and issues of the people as well as the organisation.

Develop The Strategy – Design The Program

The bottom line is that you have to know specifically, what you want your mentoring strategy to do before you can figure out how you will know that it is working. This is the foundation for designing mentoring programs. Do this to ensure that your mentoring works.

From Ann Rolfe http://mentoring-works.com/

A Good Mentor can be a Valuable Career Resource

Doris Appelbaum says in this article that a good mentor is a coach, always challenging you, inspiring you and demanding that you do your best.

Mentors can improve confidence and lead to job opportunities you had not considered. They are familiar with a range of professional opportunities and are guides who have put aside self-preoccupation to foster the growth of new professionals.

The best mentors help develop the insight and self-awareness that assist with integrating professional life, military life, personal concerns and core values.

To read the whole article,  click here: usmilitary.about.com/library/weekly/aa010603a.htm

Training Weekend in the Archipelago of Gothenburg

 The day before the training in JCI Gothenburg we went over to the city of Gothenburg, my wife, Lina (from Syria) and I. We had booked us into a nice hotel in the center for relaxing, enjoy and to show Lina the town (since my wife is from Sweden). After the tour of the city, Lina and I had time to plan the next day’s training before it was time for dinner in a town restaurant. 

 

 After 1 hour’s drive against the norwegian border, the training could start. The training "The Big Five" with Lina as co trainer for the first time. The participants were quickly tested himself as a mentor and mentee. The training is specifically structured so that there is so little time as possible to the theory and explanations, but a lot of time to practice. The first exercise where the mentee will talk only and mentor to listen (and do not show any signs to follow, or say something) is a practice that creates an aha experience. Here is where the importance of body language and to follow and immerse themselves in conversation. 

 

 Then, we went on where the mentor in the next exercise could ask questions, and here things is starting to fall into places. And all are amazed at how quickly time passes. Last exercise is where the mentor can come with questions, feedback, and not least, the mentor should try to get the mentee to reach a deadline. "When are you going to…"

 

 The exercises and not least the number of exercises will allow participants to get tested as a mentor several times, and that is the meaning. Learn it and do it! 

 

 On the way, we had several discussions related to the exercises and how they think it was and if the mentee thought that the mentor did well or something that mentor could improve. But all the trainings come to an end and unfortunately this also did, after four hours it was over and the participants an experience richer. 

 

After a training people will always be discussing things or ask more questions, so also this time. And as trainers is Lina and I especially happy when the participants are telling us that this was a surprisingly practical training. And that was what made it special and good, namely that the tools they could now go out in life and use. Already the next day, they actually could start to be a mentor on the job or in their spare time, or perhaps in the marriage. 

 

 I hope that some of the interesting ideas that emerged in the training becomes a reality, that JCI Gothenburg start a mentor program. That way, more people could get even better personal development and achieve their goals. 

 

 THANK YOU, JCI Gothenburg, Thank you from Lina and Thor-Erik.